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  3. why the hell cant men stay out of women-only spaces?

why the hell cant men stay out of women-only spaces?

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Ask Lemmy
@menarefuckings
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  • H [email protected]

    OK, I pulled out a computer for you so I could see the rules side by side with my post because my mobile client doesn't allow it.

    Rule 1: Be nice and; have fun

    Doxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here.

    OP came in swinging hot, maybe a little toxic, but there are valid points behind the hot words.

    However, OP has shown that they are able to accept other viewpoints from valid arguments (https://lemmy.ca/post/48960508/18080134). So I would argue this is borderline.

    I have to say, I have no idea what sealioning is though.

    Rule 5: This is not a support community.

    It is not a place for ‘how do I?’, type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email [email protected]. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.

    This isn't a "How do I". This is an open ended attempt (with some frustration) to try to under why members of the community do certain things.

    That's my view anyway. What's yours?

    T This user is from outside of this forum
    T This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote last edited by
    #116

    This is an open ended attempt (with some frustration) to try to under why members of the community do certain things.

    I am fine with not commenting in women-only spaces, but that is very much not what OP is trying to do. OP is venting and using a rhetorical question they don't seem to particularly want an answer to. Is that "requesting support?" Does that extend to emotional/moral support?

    I think if the OP is complaining about not following the rules and spirit of a community when posting, it seems appropriate to point out if they are violating the rules (and spirit) of the community they post it in.

    1 Reply Last reply
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    • K [email protected]

      TIL there is women only spaces on the internet. How do you even enforce it?

      starlinguk@lemmy.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
      starlinguk@lemmy.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
      [email protected]
      wrote last edited by
      #117

      With difficulty, as demonstrated here.

      1 Reply Last reply
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      • L [email protected]

        How do you know they're not women trolling as men?

        Isn't gender a social construct based on self-identification (rather than your physical body) that can be fluid & vary from day to day?
        Isn't a woman anyone who claims to be?

        Some activists even say there is no such thing as a “male body”

        A penis is not a male body part. It’s just an unusual body part for a woman.

        Messages are genderless.

        Are you complaining about unverifiable gender claims on here?
        Seems somewhat pointless & untenable.

        starlinguk@lemmy.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
        starlinguk@lemmy.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote last edited by
        #118

        You're reaching.

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        • gandalf_der_12te@discuss.tchncs.deG [email protected]

          Lemmy is a public space. Everyone can participate.

          Imagine if lemmy was a physical piece of public land. Could you create a community on it that can only be accessed by women? Something like this village?

          starlinguk@lemmy.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
          starlinguk@lemmy.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote last edited by
          #119

          There are literally women only bars and women only buses. And women only bathrooms, of course.

          gandalf_der_12te@discuss.tchncs.deG 1 Reply Last reply
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          • starlinguk@lemmy.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
            starlinguk@lemmy.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
            [email protected]
            wrote last edited by
            #120

            Women are literally being persecuted.

            S E 2 Replies Last reply
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            • starlinguk@lemmy.worldS [email protected]

              There are literally women only bars and women only buses. And women only bathrooms, of course.

              gandalf_der_12te@discuss.tchncs.deG This user is from outside of this forum
              gandalf_der_12te@discuss.tchncs.deG This user is from outside of this forum
              [email protected]
              wrote last edited by
              #121

              yeah fair. they aren't community-owned spaces like infrastructure but close enough

              now the question is whether the fediverse is closer to public infrastructure or a bar. probably the bar, i'd say.

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              • therapygary@lemmy.blahaj.zoneT [email protected]

                Why aren't people checking what community they're about to participate in? That feels like it ought to be standard behaviour

                M This user is from outside of this forum
                M This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote last edited by
                #122

                Knowing which community isn't the same as being familiar with that community's rules. Most are going to assume if they see it they can respond in some sort of "normal" fashion. Banning an entire subsection that can still see the community by rule only is asking to have a difficult to enforce rule. Complaining that a difficult to enforce rule is difficult is ... a major lack of self-awareness.

                therapygary@lemmy.blahaj.zoneT 1 Reply Last reply
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                • M [email protected]

                  Knowing which community isn't the same as being familiar with that community's rules. Most are going to assume if they see it they can respond in some sort of "normal" fashion. Banning an entire subsection that can still see the community by rule only is asking to have a difficult to enforce rule. Complaining that a difficult to enforce rule is difficult is ... a major lack of self-awareness.

                  therapygary@lemmy.blahaj.zoneT This user is from outside of this forum
                  therapygary@lemmy.blahaj.zoneT This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote last edited by
                  #123

                  Knowing which bin isn't the same as being familiar with that bin's rules. Most are going to assume if they see it they can dispose of waste in some sort of "normal" fashion. Banning an entire subsection that can still fit in the bin by rule only is asking to have a difficult to enforce rule. Complaining that a difficult to enforce rule is difficult is ... a major lack of self-awareness.

                  ~A person who throws food waste in the recycle

                  M 1 Reply Last reply
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                  • therapygary@lemmy.blahaj.zoneT [email protected]

                    Knowing which bin isn't the same as being familiar with that bin's rules. Most are going to assume if they see it they can dispose of waste in some sort of "normal" fashion. Banning an entire subsection that can still fit in the bin by rule only is asking to have a difficult to enforce rule. Complaining that a difficult to enforce rule is difficult is ... a major lack of self-awareness.

                    ~A person who throws food waste in the recycle

                    M This user is from outside of this forum
                    M This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote last edited by
                    #124

                    There is a MASSIVE difference between a bin with an entirely different color and/or receptacle and just another community thread.

                    Nice irrelevant strawman, though.

                    therapygary@lemmy.blahaj.zoneT 1 Reply Last reply
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                    • M [email protected]

                      There is a MASSIVE difference between a bin with an entirely different color and/or receptacle and just another community thread.

                      Nice irrelevant strawman, though.

                      therapygary@lemmy.blahaj.zoneT This user is from outside of this forum
                      therapygary@lemmy.blahaj.zoneT This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote last edited by
                      #125

                      There's not. You sound exactly like people who try to justify throwing garbage in a recycling bin

                      M amnesigenic@lemmy.mlA 2 Replies Last reply
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                      • starlinguk@lemmy.worldS [email protected]

                        Women are literally being persecuted.

                        S This user is from outside of this forum
                        S This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote last edited by
                        #126

                        Welcome to being working class. Write your regime whore to a complaint.

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                        • therapygary@lemmy.blahaj.zoneT [email protected]

                          There's not. You sound exactly like people who try to justify throwing garbage in a recycling bin

                          M This user is from outside of this forum
                          M This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote last edited by
                          #127

                          You don't even understand your own analogy. Genuinely, pathetic.

                          1 Reply Last reply
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                          • originalucifer@moist.catsweat.comO [email protected]

                            im so sick of seeing reports regarding men posting in women-only communities and i cant help but get annoyed with these guys.

                            the rules are clearly presented. either youre not paying attention or youre just an asshole who purposefully throws their opinion in a place explicitly not wanting it.

                            what the fuck is wrong with you guys?

                            E This user is from outside of this forum
                            E This user is from outside of this forum
                            [email protected]
                            wrote last edited by
                            #128

                            "somegroup"-only communities really feels like discrimination to me

                            1 Reply Last reply
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                            • E This user is from outside of this forum
                              E This user is from outside of this forum
                              [email protected]
                              wrote last edited by
                              #129

                              Those "Women ☕" and "Men ☕" people are the worst

                              E 1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • E [email protected]

                                Those "Women ☕" and "Men ☕" people are the worst

                                E This user is from outside of this forum
                                E This user is from outside of this forum
                                [email protected]
                                wrote last edited by
                                #130

                                (for those that don't get it, it's the type of comment you get from people generalizing, discriminating and just being sexist)

                                1 Reply Last reply
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                                • T [email protected]

                                  Lmao the thread shows all the exact problems laid bare.

                                  You got the denial guy, you got the false equivalency guy, you got the not all men guy, just incredible they're all here.

                                  E This user is from outside of this forum
                                  E This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #131

                                  Blahaj certified comment

                                  Obviously it's blahaj again

                                  E 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • E [email protected]

                                    Blahaj certified comment

                                    Obviously it's blahaj again

                                    E This user is from outside of this forum
                                    E This user is from outside of this forum
                                    [email protected]
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #132

                                    Blahaj: discriminating minorities is forbidden, discriminating majorities is allowed

                                    1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • B [email protected]

                                      These comments…

                                      what the fuck is wrong with you guys?

                                      +1

                                      Community rules are community rules, and you can either follow them or get banned from the community. How is ‘women only’ any different?

                                      As for the excuse of visibility: the rule is very often in the title, and the initial post, yet not followed.

                                      As for the excuse of how they can tell: well if they can’t, okay, you evaded detection. But posts very often declare “I’m a guy and this is my take…”

                                      I honestly don’t get it, especially on an internet “refuge” like Lemmy where users should be sensitive to persecution and the importance of safe, moderated discussion spaces.

                                      E This user is from outside of this forum
                                      E This user is from outside of this forum
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                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #133

                                      safe, moderated discussion spaces

                                      They're the most fake spaces, filled with copium and confirmation bias

                                      1 Reply Last reply
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                                      • W [email protected]

                                        Something about a women only space triggers people. Just look at the people replying here. They can't seem to help themselves.

                                        E This user is from outside of this forum
                                        E This user is from outside of this forum
                                        [email protected]
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #134

                                        Something about a "group" only space will trigger me regardless.

                                        1 Reply Last reply
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                                        • H [email protected]

                                          This is a false equivalency, my dude. There are definitely good reasons for people who generally face systemic discrimination (ie. Women, black people) to have separate communities from those they face discrimination from (men, white people). It’s not like they are trying to divorce themselves from society at large.

                                          E This user is from outside of this forum
                                          E This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote last edited by [email protected]
                                          #135

                                          Why not have a community of people that are against this discrimination, rather than just having the targets of it? I feel like it doesn't really help..

                                          And anyways, pleading your cause publicly will always be better imo. Better to avoid confirmation bias and other bs

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