Not stealing
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10:1 odds that neither of you currently have a toddler.
I've had two, go fish.
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I've been reading some variation of this joke since the early 80s.
I am confident it can be found somewhere in Shakespeare's plays and perhaps on clay tablets hidden deep in the Mesopotamian valley.
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Hard to tell from so little info. You can make a kid act like that by being a shitty parent, but they can also have issues unbidden that stretch you past your breaking point.
In any case, they don't seem to have a healthy relationship.
My kid just had a screaming fit with big fat tears rolling down his face because he reached the bottom of the stairs. The other day, he was howling crying because I had a different colored bowl than he did. I have indeed had to carry my kid out of a public space to go calm down. I do my best to be calm and empathetic to him but emotional regulation is something they grow into.
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It's funny because children aren't people. Or something...
It's just funny to use the word that means a different thing but close
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My kid just had a screaming fit with big fat tears rolling down his face because he reached the bottom of the stairs. The other day, he was howling crying because I had a different colored bowl than he did. I have indeed had to carry my kid out of a public space to go calm down. I do my best to be calm and empathetic to him but emotional regulation is something they grow into.
That's the best you can do. Upset is normal. Throwing things is normal.
Kicking, punching and violence to the point where you have to make excuses that you're not kidnapping isn't.
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Kinda reminds me of when I was using dating apps, and women would ask how they knew I wasn't a serial killer. "If I was a serial killer, it would be pretty stupid to leave a bunch of digital records of me being the last person my victim talked to, I'd get caught immediately."
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I’m so feeling this this morning. I asked the 4yo if he wanted cereal or yogurt for breakfast. He screams “I’m not hungry! I want mama!”, runs to his room and slams the door. Two minutes later he comes out and punches me in the dick while I’m making lunches.
You know, this weirdly makes the whole shit world-state seem much more natural lol
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It's just funny to use the word that means a different thing but close
I'm not shoplifting this child.
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I'm not shoplifting this child.
Or alternatively,
I'm not kidnapping this money/these goods/etc
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I don't think the apple falls very far from the tree
Found the childless one who knows better. Always at least one of you.
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10:1 odds that neither of you currently have a toddler.
Nah, that's a fools bet lol.
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That's the best you can do. Upset is normal. Throwing things is normal.
Kicking, punching and violence to the point where you have to make excuses that you're not kidnapping isn't.
I think that really depends on the kid too. I've had one behave like that fairly regularly until he grew out of it; the other will get upset rarely, and never in public.
The post read to me as the dad cracking a dry joke, not actually making an excuse.
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I’m so feeling this this morning. I asked the 4yo if he wanted cereal or yogurt for breakfast. He screams “I’m not hungry! I want mama!”, runs to his room and slams the door. Two minutes later he comes out and punches me in the dick while I’m making lunches.
I love hearing other parents have asshole kids, because it reminds me that I'm not alone.
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... but if you were to call the cops on me at least it would be a brief yet welcome reprieve from parenting while they come to the inevitable conclusion that he is mine and they don't want him around either
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This post did not contain any content.wrote last edited by [email protected]
Yeah kids. Cannot throw them away, cannot kill'em. Or so says the "law" apparently.
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I think that really depends on the kid too. I've had one behave like that fairly regularly until he grew out of it; the other will get upset rarely, and never in public.
The post read to me as the dad cracking a dry joke, not actually making an excuse.
to me as the dad cracking a dry joke, not actually making
That's fair. I'd still get smacked upside my head by my wife, but to each their own
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Nah, that's a fools bet lol.
Sounds like you're an AI.
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I’m so feeling this this morning. I asked the 4yo if he wanted cereal or yogurt for breakfast. He screams “I’m not hungry! I want mama!”, runs to his room and slams the door. Two minutes later he comes out and punches me in the dick while I’m making lunches.
I mean, the dick punch was really unnecessary but I am glad that other families experience... Weirdness, I guess. And exclusion of a parent.
I can't count how often I read and heard the advice to "just present your kid with two options to choose from".
My kid, even before she became verbal, always wanted option C when presented with two options.
"Do you want this hat or this cap?" "Neither"
"Do you want this blue pants or these red sweatpants?" "I want... a green... dress" we don't even have a green dress.
"Shall we go to the zoo today or do you want to go to the playground with Anna?" "I want to go on the trampoline" .
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Sounds like you're an AI.
You have shit judgment?
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You have shit judgment?
wrote last edited by [email protected]I was just following instructions ...
edit: Though I will admit you're not wrong about my judgement.
