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  3. Foolproof advice

Foolproof advice

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Lemmy Shitpost
lemmyshitpost
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  • omniman@anarchist.nexusO [email protected]

    if i fill her in will she respectfully become my gf ?

    B This user is from outside of this forum
    B This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote last edited by
    #15

    No, for that you have to fill her up.

    omniman@anarchist.nexusO 1 Reply Last reply
    4
    • L [email protected]

      Sounds condescending. Why not just compliment her ovipositor?

      beigeagenda@lemmy.caB This user is from outside of this forum
      beigeagenda@lemmy.caB This user is from outside of this forum
      [email protected]
      wrote last edited by
      #16

      Madam, my compliments to your ovaries šŸŽ©šŸ’ŖšŸ¼šŸ„ššŸ™‡

      1 Reply Last reply
      12
      • S [email protected]
        This post did not contain any content.
        I This user is from outside of this forum
        I This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote last edited by
        #17

        Lol who wrote this, Ben Shapiro?

        D 1 Reply Last reply
        19
        • G [email protected]

          This must be why the site is still in Beta

          H This user is from outside of this forum
          H This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote last edited by
          #18

          I'm surprised they fought the urge to stay alpha forever

          1 Reply Last reply
          3
          • B [email protected]

            No, for that you have to fill her up.

            omniman@anarchist.nexusO This user is from outside of this forum
            omniman@anarchist.nexusO This user is from outside of this forum
            [email protected]
            wrote last edited by
            #19

            Fill her up with love šŸ„ŗšŸ‘‰šŸ‘ˆ

            A 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • S [email protected]
              This post did not contain any content.
              S This user is from outside of this forum
              S This user is from outside of this forum
              [email protected]
              wrote last edited by
              #20

              We all know that won't work. Try this instead.

              kolanaki@pawb.socialK bluelinebae@midwest.socialB washedupcynic@lemmy.caW F K 11 Replies Last reply
              179
              • K [email protected]

                That sounds like Strong Bad's alter ego.

                D This user is from outside of this forum
                D This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote last edited by
                #21

                The Cheat is vacuuming.

                S 1 Reply Last reply
                14
                • B [email protected]

                  What's sad about learning something new and getting laid?

                  D This user is from outside of this forum
                  D This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote last edited by
                  #22

                  Please fertilise my egg, I just vacuumed.

                  B 1 Reply Last reply
                  9
                  • S [email protected]

                    We all know that won't work. Try this instead.

                    kolanaki@pawb.socialK This user is from outside of this forum
                    kolanaki@pawb.socialK This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote last edited by
                    #23

                    "Are you ovulating? I have cheese if you are."

                    R S K 3 Replies Last reply
                    60
                    • L [email protected]

                      Sounds condescending. Why not just compliment her ovipositor?

                      D This user is from outside of this forum
                      D This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote last edited by
                      #24

                      My dear, your claoca looks especially receptive this fine evening.

                      C B 2 Replies Last reply
                      12
                      • kolanaki@pawb.socialK [email protected]

                        "Are you ovulating? I have cheese if you are."

                        R This user is from outside of this forum
                        R This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote last edited by
                        #25

                        To be fair, cheese works on most people, whether or not they're ovulating.

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        11
                        • D [email protected]

                          Please fertilise my egg, I just vacuumed.

                          B This user is from outside of this forum
                          B This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote last edited by
                          #26

                          Certainly, m'lady!

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          2
                          • D [email protected]

                            My dear, your claoca looks especially receptive this fine evening.

                            C This user is from outside of this forum
                            C This user is from outside of this forum
                            [email protected]
                            wrote last edited by
                            #27

                            Why, thank you, I've just been to the remora. And might I say what a stable dorsal fin you have.

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            5
                            • kolanaki@pawb.socialK [email protected]

                              "Are you ovulating? I have cheese if you are."

                              S This user is from outside of this forum
                              S This user is from outside of this forum
                              [email protected]
                              wrote last edited by
                              #28

                              Yes, that one there officer. He tried to put a Kraft Single in my bra.

                              lime@feddit.nuL 1 Reply Last reply
                              39
                              • S [email protected]

                                Yes, that one there officer. He tried to put a Kraft Single in my bra.

                                lime@feddit.nuL This user is from outside of this forum
                                lime@feddit.nuL This user is from outside of this forum
                                [email protected]
                                wrote last edited by
                                #29

                                no wonder it didn't work, that's not even cheese

                                asidonhopo@lemmy.worldA 1 Reply Last reply
                                33
                                • S [email protected]
                                  This post did not contain any content.
                                  B This user is from outside of this forum
                                  B This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #30

                                  "No, stop, where are you going? I have it on very good authority that you enjoy this!"

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  2
                                  • B [email protected]

                                    Lol. I hoped that would be obvious.

                                    T This user is from outside of this forum
                                    T This user is from outside of this forum
                                    [email protected]
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #31

                                    Hi. Welcome to the Internet.

                                    C 1 Reply Last reply
                                    5
                                    • S [email protected]

                                      We all know that won't work. Try this instead.

                                      bluelinebae@midwest.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                      bluelinebae@midwest.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                      [email protected]
                                      wrote last edited by [email protected]
                                      #32

                                      That shoe one just reminded me that when we bought our house and had to start renovations on it, the attic had lots of women's shoes. Just one shoe from a pair and all different shoes. I have so many questions for the previous owner, but unfortunately they are no longer with us.

                                      S E 2 Replies Last reply
                                      2
                                      • S [email protected]
                                        This post did not contain any content.
                                        S This user is from outside of this forum
                                        S This user is from outside of this forum
                                        [email protected]
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #33

                                        Suckers gonna suck

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • S [email protected]

                                          We all know that won't work. Try this instead.

                                          washedupcynic@lemmy.caW This user is from outside of this forum
                                          washedupcynic@lemmy.caW This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #34

                                          Fun fact, the digestion of milk/cheese creates casomorphins from caesin, one of the most prominent peptides in milk. Casomorphins can activate opioid receptors. Giving a woman a slice of cheese might work in your benefit if she eats the cheese.

                                          F 1 Reply Last reply
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