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Foolproof advice

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Lemmy Shitpost
lemmyshitpost
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  • bluelinebae@midwest.socialB [email protected]

    That shoe one just reminded me that when we bought our house and had to start renovations on it, the attic had lots of women's shoes. Just one shoe from a pair and all different shoes. I have so many questions for the previous owner, but unfortunately they are no longer with us.

    E This user is from outside of this forum
    E This user is from outside of this forum
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    wrote last edited by
    #69

    Maybe they robbed a shoe store. On displays they frequently leave one shoe from a pair so that stealing them just nets you a pile of left shoes lol

    1 Reply Last reply
    1
    • E [email protected]

      Not sure if AI or just incredibly stupid.

      G This user is from outside of this forum
      G This user is from outside of this forum
      [email protected]
      wrote last edited by
      #70

      Why not both?

      E 1 Reply Last reply
      5
      • venus_ziegenfalle@feddit.orgV [email protected]

        In the unlikely event that she reacts poorly she might be on her period. You should ask her to make sure though.

        O This user is from outside of this forum
        O This user is from outside of this forum
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        wrote last edited by [email protected]
        #71

        Yeah i always take stock and usually calm down when a guy im arguing with points that out.

        1 Reply Last reply
        10
        • I [email protected]

          TIL I ovulate every Sunday 😂😅

          O This user is from outside of this forum
          O This user is from outside of this forum
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          wrote last edited by
          #72

          Where the fuck do you keep all the eggs? Do you have a walk in fridge?

          M 1 Reply Last reply
          5
          • S [email protected]

            We all know that won't work. Try this instead.

            O This user is from outside of this forum
            O This user is from outside of this forum
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            wrote last edited by
            #73

            My ex gf and i used to steal each other fancy cheeses. It was the most intense love i have ever felt.

            dharmacurious@startrek.websiteD I 2 Replies Last reply
            7
            • cruxifux@feddit.nlC [email protected]

              This has to be satire.

              O This user is from outside of this forum
              O This user is from outside of this forum
              [email protected]
              wrote last edited by [email protected]
              #74

              It's not. This has worked on me four times.

              1 Reply Last reply
              1
              • walk_blessed@piefed.blahaj.zoneW [email protected]

                I am once again asking lemmy users to check what community they're in before commenting

                O This user is from outside of this forum
                O This user is from outside of this forum
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                wrote last edited by
                #75

                You can't really expect consciousness from straight cis men.

                E 1 Reply Last reply
                2
                • D [email protected]

                  It's typo progressive for him. He's the "your wife shouldn't get wet" type.

                  Edit: autocorrect fail in the worst/best way there

                  O This user is from outside of this forum
                  O This user is from outside of this forum
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                  wrote last edited by
                  #76

                  Dont get her wet, don't feed her after midnight. Hes very strict about rules for his wife.

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  2
                  • E [email protected]

                    Not sure if AI or just incredibly stupid.

                    entropicdrift@lemmy.sdf.orgE This user is from outside of this forum
                    entropicdrift@lemmy.sdf.orgE This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote last edited by
                    #77

                    Pretty sure it's a joke.

                    E 1 Reply Last reply
                    16
                    • O [email protected]

                      My ex gf and i used to steal each other fancy cheeses. It was the most intense love i have ever felt.

                      dharmacurious@startrek.websiteD This user is from outside of this forum
                      dharmacurious@startrek.websiteD This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote last edited by
                      #78

                      My mom and I used to steal fancy cheese for each other. God I miss that woman like you can't believe. 10/10 mom and person.

                      O 1 Reply Last reply
                      3
                      • S [email protected]

                        dharmacurious@startrek.websiteD This user is from outside of this forum
                        dharmacurious@startrek.websiteD This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote last edited by
                        #79

                        Would marry that farmer. No questions asked, no long engagement. Straight to the court house, we're getting hitched.

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        8
                        • S [email protected]

                          kilgore_trout@feddit.itK This user is from outside of this forum
                          kilgore_trout@feddit.itK This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote last edited by
                          #80

                          Bro, plastic cheese…

                          H 1 Reply Last reply
                          1
                          • entropicdrift@lemmy.sdf.orgE [email protected]

                            Pretty sure it's a joke.

                            E This user is from outside of this forum
                            E This user is from outside of this forum
                            [email protected]
                            wrote last edited by
                            #81

                            We live in a post irony world and I literally can't tell the difference without knowing the source.

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            17
                            • G [email protected]

                              Why not both?

                              E This user is from outside of this forum
                              E This user is from outside of this forum
                              [email protected]
                              wrote last edited by
                              #82

                              Of course, I forgot answer C. All of the above.

                              1 Reply Last reply
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                              • omniman@anarchist.nexusO [email protected]

                                Fill her up with love 🥺👉👈

                                A This user is from outside of this forum
                                A This user is from outside of this forum
                                [email protected]
                                wrote last edited by
                                #83

                                Few squirts of liquid love

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • dharmacurious@startrek.websiteD [email protected]

                                  My mom and I used to steal fancy cheese for each other. God I miss that woman like you can't believe. 10/10 mom and person.

                                  O This user is from outside of this forum
                                  O This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #84

                                  This made me cry.

                                  dharmacurious@startrek.websiteD 1 Reply Last reply
                                  1
                                  • O [email protected]

                                    Where the fuck do you keep all the eggs? Do you have a walk in fridge?

                                    M This user is from outside of this forum
                                    M This user is from outside of this forum
                                    [email protected]
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #85

                                    In europe we store our eggs unrefrigerated

                                    O 1 Reply Last reply
                                    4
                                    • S [email protected]

                                      We all know that won't work. Try this instead.

                                      M This user is from outside of this forum
                                      M This user is from outside of this forum
                                      [email protected]
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #86

                                      I keep stealing shoes, and filling it with rue, but all it's given me are shouting matches

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      3
                                      • M [email protected]

                                        In europe we store our eggs unrefrigerated

                                        O This user is from outside of this forum
                                        O This user is from outside of this forum
                                        [email protected]
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #87

                                        The chicken ones, sure, but are all your climates mild enough that they hatch like that?

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • venus_ziegenfalle@feddit.orgV [email protected]

                                          In the unlikely event that she reacts poorly she might be on her period. You should ask her to make sure though.

                                          L This user is from outside of this forum
                                          L This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #88

                                          And if the woman happens to overreact to the period question, just politely tell her to calm down.

                                          I A 2 Replies Last reply
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